Jdwin's Blog

DDDDDDDDAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMIIITTTTTTTTTTTT!!!!!!!!

jdwin — Thu, 03 Feb 2011 10:07:30 +0000

How long has it been since I last posted anything!!!! well it is a good time to post something before the crtc takes away your right to affordable internet and access to boundless amounts of porn. I mean, information. Knowledge and stuff. Also all hell broke loose in Egypt (it has been like that for awhile, I know) and the secretary of state was supportive of the president ( Sargent shallow grave or president Mubarak however you spell it) and Joe Biden, vice president of the united states and chief official on Americans making stupid decisions that will not help them in the long run in foreign affairs, said that Mubarak was NOT a totalitarian dictator who has been rigging elections and staying in power for thirty years while oppressing the people of Egypt. Man has the world gone crazy? When did it start before or after Nixon?

Is it just me or has the united states become a schizophrenic obsessed with tearing off its own limbs, spending more money than it has, making more enemies than it will EVER need and denying itself universal health care so that it may suffer even more? Not that Canada isn’t screwed up.We decide to let the schizophrenic give us a piggy back ride so we may follow it wherever it may go. We decide we want to be more like it. So we try to make sure we cannot afford access to the internet, the only place where you can decide what may be the truth based on many different views, not just the views of biased news stations. And like the States we host the Olympics which shoves us in debt for a good long time. Just like the states. Cause we wanna be crazy too.

Riot

jdwin — Fri, 30 Jul 2010 21:28:13 +0000

I suppose, this is a bit late. The happenings in Toronto, though it has been barely a month since then, seem so far away. But, it will help me touch on a simple fact. A reality some need to be more awake to. When you try to communicate a message, it is easy to be heard physically but the fact of the matter is you get nowhere if people do not want to listen. People want to listen even less when all they see is what they can patronize.

When, you want people to hear you out you need to take into account one thing. Appeal. how do you appeal to people. You need to fashion an image that can interest those people from all different backgrounds. You also have to be determined to succeed and get into politics. Or at least business. There can be no success for you otherwise. Get some life experience under your belt. than go after the bastards in government. Oh, and if you do plan to protest, make an agreement with your fellow protesters to non-violence beforehand and to exclude anyone who would resort to violence.

Also, leave religion at the door. Pagan, Christian, Muslim or otherwise. No babilling on about the “goddess” (I saw a youtube video.)No one will take you seriously. I am not damning those of the religious persuasion but it is true you have to appeal to everyone. I had a little chuckle at the guy with the megaphone: “feel the power of the goddess within you!” I’m sorry, is my atheist showing? Don’t worry I would laugh at any other guy trying to appeal to a crowd with any other religion.That’s just how I roll.

Understanding

jdwin — Fri, 23 Jul 2010 05:27:38 +0000

What makes us who we are? Is it our outer image? Is it the portrayal of others that makes us who we are? I was always confused, or rather, ignorant of my own confusion as to who I was. I was lazy, selfish, and a liar. I shaped my own realty, or delusion with what others said of me and who or what I was. I was a stoner. A stoner who only smoked weed twice in his entire life. I lied about my life to further delude others as to who I really was. Even to this day there are people who think they know me, but, in fact, they are only dancing in the little pool of lies I made for them. I only smoked weed those few times to confirm to them That I was a stoner. As ridiculous it was, I felt it was the only way I would be accepted. No one could possibly accept the real Julian. What a fool I was. There was never anything wrong with me. Also by being lazy, I only perpetuated my own suffering. It was my own damn fault, but I still despise them. all of those around to be near my own personal circus of self destruction. I should not.

Even the one girl I actually had a cliche crush on I despised once. She’s one of the only ones I’d use the past tense for. Being in the same room with her used to make me want to puke. I really was pathetic. My like for her turned to disgust when jealousy came upon me. She had a full family, who, in turn, had money and a nice shiny house. (although I do believe I am Lucky to have such a good mother, I still felt that empty space was always there. no father. No real one, anyway.Bastard.) she had a good life, good freinds, everything I wanted. Or, at least, wanted to believe I had. Although, my life got a hell of a lot nicer when I changed schools and decided to go for a better life for once. I wonder, if I met her again, would I feel as disgusted? I am no longer wallowing in a fake reality. I think It’s time to let go.

Now, I can look to the past with some understanding. That, life requires we take into account the harsh, and some times, rewarding reality of things. The reality is, my suffering was my own fault. I did not work hard and lied to myself. I did not summon up enough confidence in myself to realize what I was doing to my future. I have decided to look at my life with one key word. Understanding. To be able to see things for what they truly are. I will pay back my mother in full for all she has done for me. I will build a better life for myself and my little brother as well as my mother. (even though my little brother is a dick.) I know who I am now.

Martial arts!

jdwin — Sat, 08 May 2010 04:55:12 +0000

For the past 3 or 4 months I have been thinking of learning a martial art. I am obsessed with MMA and I am seriously interested. I finally came to the dwcision last week abou it. First I have to get into shape, so I have been jogging and working out to improve my physical state. My mood has improve lately and i am beginning to ache less and less from exercise, so wish me luck! Also, I began reading Brave New World by aldous huxley (I think I have Mentioned it before) and I want to hear your opinions on the novel. Please comment.

F451!!

jdwin — Sat, 24 Apr 2010 23:49:41 +0000

I am currently reading “Fahrenheit 451″. Bradbury’s frustration with people censoring his work really comes through in his work. I am also beginning to read “Brave new world” by Aldous Huxley. Two vwry good books to read if ypu are into sarcasm, anger, and distopian themes.

I have been listening to a lot of dance and calassic rock along with my metal recently. Here, have some bodom along with some S.A.M. and some deadmau5 along with some kansas. because I feel like it.

Death

jdwin — Thu, 08 Apr 2010 04:56:53 +0000

This subject is quite dark, but I feel a need to touch on it. As humans we encounter death every day. through video games, TV, movies , or just plain media, we are constantly bombarded with the idea, the subject, the feeling, and the pronouncement of death. It is only when we meet death in person and lose someone close do we truly know of the horrid, but unavoidable nature of death.

We try to escape the fear of death through religion and just downright ignorance, but we cannot escape it. Although most claim to fear it, those same people turn on their television set to watch it in action. Real or not the curiosity is there. to watch vicariously through other people’s eyes. Why do we do this? Is it to release some, darker self into a world of imagination where there are no laws to bind these darker urges? I personally accept the inevitability of death. I like to even have a morbid curiosity myself.

Give me your comment or insights.

Why?

jdwin — Fri, 26 Mar 2010 03:25:44 +0000

Why. It,s a word used to begin a question (obviously). I have herd many stupid questions including this one word. It never managed to annoy me. Until now. Why do I listen to metal? Am I an angry person? No, so then why? Well, I started listening to it at about, grade seven. Just a little bit. Pretty soon it dominated all my CDs and my mp3 player. I listen to metal because of the feeling it gives me. Not an angry feeling, an elated one. You ever have that feeling? You know, when the muscles on the back of your neck tighten, like your body itself is telling you to start head-banging? Well, if you’ve never had such a feeling you either A. have never really felt truly exited about anything or B. Never really listened to any metal properly. To properly listen to metal, one must feel the energy of the music. After you feel the energy, expend it in the correct fashion (ie. head-banging).

It’s a stupid question people. DO NOT ASK

Also, I being a metal-head also hold dual citizenship with Geeks and the like. Yes, the geek in me. I love Magic the gathering. any discussions. Oh, Magic. So addictive. I should totally geek-out on you guys some day.

PS. Surprise! Sepultura and Patton Oswalt

lost ideas

jdwin — Tue, 23 Mar 2010 04:15:49 +0000

I had some ideas for this post, but I forgot. I hate it when that happens. You lose sight of your own opinion and cannot get it back. You only remember when you need it the least. Wait… I feel an idea coming on… yes! Religion. Why do we have it? I think we need to delve deep into ourselves and ask a different question. If you lived in a time far simpler than today, a time long past, and you were considerably intelligent. What would you do?

You would consider you situation, scout your surroundings and locate an area of near dense population. You would observe the people there. you would recognize some basic characteristics about them. Fear, curiosity, and ignorance. you would begin to build your religion. You would then recognize the seasons and solstices to tell farmers when to plat crop and such. This would put you, eventually in a position of leadership and word of your prophecies would spread. To further spread your false beliefs you would absorb and copy other religion’s traditions and holidays. Christianity is born. And other religions. Islam is different though. A lot of blood spilled to spread that one. Please comment an give me your opinion.

Black comedy and gore rocks!!

jdwin — Sat, 20 Mar 2010 01:42:00 +0000

Do you enjoy black comedy? Do you love gore and slasher flicks? Do you enjoy a foreign film every once and awhile? Well Here’s Dead Snow. It’s got suspense, gore, and Nazi zombies. Its abou some norweigian coeds going to stay in a cabin out in the wilderness to ski, snowboard, and do winter stuff. They have a pretty good time up untill one of them finds a strange box… then everything goes to hell. funny, gory, and I recommend it to anyone who wants gore with their laughs. If you have already seen the movie, you may give your own opinion on the film. I’ll post the trailer along with a tool music video (sober).

SECOND POST!!!

jdwin — Fri, 19 Mar 2010 03:33:09 +0000

Today in English 11 we were doing an assignment on Edgar Allan Poe’s Black Cat. It was one of those imp of the perverse short stories, that ends in the killer (or criminal) causing their own demise. I am a fan of Poe’s work, so today was a good day for me. It kind of puts me in the mood for meshuggah. Meshuggah is Yiddish for insane and the name of a prominent metal band. I’ll post a video. Comment question: How do you feel about the horror genre in general? Do you enjoy the morbidity and the suspense, or do you dislike it just for those very traits? What do you think? please comment.